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BY NOT REPLYING TO A MESSAGE IS THE BEST WAY TO SAY AM NOT INTEREST IN YOU ?

BY NOT REPLYING TO A MESSAGE IS THE BEST WAY TO SAY AM NOT INTEREST IN YOU ?

boiejalloh Created May 20, 2016 17:22
23 Comments

Salam Brothers and Sisters

Not attacking any body's doing, but a question please ?

''Person A'' : write a message to ''Person B''

Person B : No reply at all

and you can find ''person B'' online most of the time

Is this the best way to say am not interest in your message/Discussion ?

OR should we simply reply by saying am not interest.


''OR'
CAN WE SUGGEST A VERY NICE WAY TO SAY THINGS OUT INSTEAD OF NOT REPLY ?'

 

This topic has 29 comments

سعيد

May 21, 2016 13:36

Amin thuma amin

response with respect to example of a sister not replying to a request....

if the sister is a chaste Muslimah, it may be right not to respond if when interested, as her silence may imply consent

some Muslimah are afraid of not hurting a Muslim's feeling by turning down their request; is this is modesty or cowardice?

profiles are not displayed in detail on this platform

approach with tesleem and general discussion before discussing courting matters





TheP@in13

Jun 20, 2016 02:36

Muslims suppsed to be better than this ... more understanding of Qadar .. islam is the religion of deals.

KM

Jun 23, 2016 07:11

@islamdeen I love your answer. I prefer not to reply at all for the reasons that you just said! Often times the brother is not gracious or understanding and ends up arguing with me so I stopped responding at all.

I also think that you made a great point...look for someone in your own country! Despite highlighting it in my profile, I receive nonsense emails all the time so I don't even open them.

I think everyone should take your advice

danish

Jun 23, 2016 12:27

islamisdeen brother u talk beautifully can you explain in light of quran is there any written in quran where the man should has to marry or any restriction on overseas marriages according to quran if no Sorry to say bro in you last talk useless addition !

danish

Jun 26, 2016 22:03

brother i have read what you said and sees what u quotes from quran and hadis but some time we made assumption according to our own understandings and there is no written in quran restriction over abroad marriage in quran or according to hadess what quran said marry to woman who is religious and faithful in the path what god has directed them simple and its not emotional its logical something isn't highlighted properly why to canned yourself !

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Deleted User

Jun 27, 2016 17:49

The best answer to me is to reply as follows;
1.If someone messaged you is far from you e.g different countries, Then the best answer if you are not interested is "I appreciate your interest but i'm prefer someone from my country" | This is best answer.
2.If you are patriotic with colors/ethnicity etc then just reply to someone that "I am not interested, find another person please"
......or any good words that someone will feel that you respected his feeling/interest, normally if you apply something you will get one of the two answers either Yes or No.

|NEVER REPLY|
1. "Do not even think about me" This is one of the rude answers that no one will feel good if you reply to.
2. " Never underestimate anyone for any reason especially if you don't know him/her physically"

............................................................................................

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Deleted User

Jun 27, 2016 19:59

Ma shaa Allah

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Deleted User

Jun 27, 2016 20:00

Ma shaa Allah

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irfan Ul-Haq

Jun 27, 2016 20:40

Well as far as this marrying abroad thing is concerned I have seen many interracial couples living quite a happy life. My brother is married to an indonasian women. I live in pakistan and my neighbour is married to an indian girl. The couple resides in pakistan now.
I can quite you many examples in this regard.
And when it comes to islamisdeen quoting ahadees and ayaat. all of those were irrelevant with this thing. It can be his personal point of view that one should marry in his own country but it has nothing to do with Islam. interracial marriages were practically encouraged throughout the golden era of Islam. Don't forget that islamic concept of nation is broader than other petty nationalities.

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irfan Ul-Haq

Jun 27, 2016 20:45

And I think that if your message isn't entertained so there is nothing to feel bad for it. Every one has his/her own thinking.

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irfan Ul-Haq

Jun 27, 2016 21:30

By the way mr.islamisdeen who are you to tell Danish if he should marry a white girl or a black one?
if You think that one should marry in his own country then why not to get more specific??? Why country? Why not one's own city?Why not one's own town? Why not one's own street? and why not one's own family?
And if you believe that much in area and colour similarity then why are you here?haven't your town or city got any female? If it has then you should probably delete your account from this website and prove that you are not a hypocrite. There is no difference between your thoughts and deeds. JAZAKALLAH KHAIRUN

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Deleted User

Jun 28, 2016 07:17

Yes Marriage has no borders like country,color etc as long as we are all muslims then no problem.If you are white/black you can marry any muslim from any country no matter the color or anything, Your preference is matter as long as you are able to do so.
"Wallah A'lam"
Ramadhan Mubarrak,

danish

Jun 28, 2016 11:33

Ramzan Mubarak problem resolved by many brothers allah hafiz

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irfan Ul-Haq

Jun 28, 2016 16:01

SubhanAllaah,who said that by interacting a woman with the purpose of marriage will lead to a sin?it's your assumption.
Who said that he woudnt contact to woman's wali and would marry her without her wali's consent? Again assumption.
And when it comes to this thing that a couple might not enter into a sinful relation because they live in the same country then I find it logicless . Why? Because they are more vulnerable to satan than those who live in different counties.
For instance if I want to marry a girl who lives in my country. Her location will give both of us chance to interact again and again,we can go on dates. In short we can proceed towards all kinds of sins.
But if we live in different countries then the window of opportunity will be less.
Nobody says that this matrimonial web thing is perfect but it's better than the suggestions you have come up with. Atleast it decreases the chance of dating.

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Deleted User

Jun 28, 2016 17:48

islamisdeen, The problem is whenever a marriage is talked about i have seen many of times black brothers take it offensive they do not take the sharia upfront they only take whatever suits them.
Who told you that black brothers take it offensive and not take sharia they just follow what suits them?
can you explain how and only black brothers?

danish

Jun 28, 2016 19:05

PbUH Married to kHADIJA she was traders business woman and lived outside where muhammad was not living if there was boarder restriction and it was haram to married outside to your territory prophet wont get married your intention is not explaining what i ask u before your discussing different principles of islam bro instead of turning the topic to the other direction i ask you the same question can you prove it there any written in quran and hadis that overseas marriage is forbid by the god !

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irfan Ul-Haq

Jun 28, 2016 20:53

Islamisdeen!you have actually just given a ruling that who ever texts to opposite gender does kuffar.very well.I tell you something.
When there was a war going on in Bosnia(a former province of Serbia).pakistan army was sent there to help the Bosnian Muslims.When they got there,they found Bosnian girls wearing jeans and socializing with males openly and many of them had even got Christian boyfriends. When Pakistani people saw that then they got surprised and didn't feel good about their attitudes towards Islamic values.
When these soldiers discused that matter with their superiors then they got a very good Answer that motivated them even more to help them.
They were told that no matter if they are non practicing Muslims but don't forget that they could kill their Muslim identity to avoid from being massacred .But they didn't. They are fighting for it. They are sacrificing their lives for it.Islam is still amongst them.there is light.
I hope that some day you get eyes to see that light.because if a minor thing like texting is kuffar then Bosnian Muslims were something more than kafirs.

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irfan Ul-Haq

Jun 28, 2016 20:59

And you are right that people use "if and buts" to justify their desires. Right now Am looking for a calculator to calculate the number of "if and buts" you have used in your statements.
Thank you

danish

Jun 28, 2016 21:23

bro irfan u nailed the last screw into the coffin

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irfan Ul-Haq

Jun 28, 2016 22:55

Islamisdeen!
My dear brother jahil (ignotant) is the one who speaks in the trance of his scholarly superiority,without shaking his head and choosing his words carefully,and when finds himself speechless then he starts offending,sometimes by calling others jahil and sometimes by accusing black men.
Now I can also call you jahil etc but I won't because I know that in your next post you might even deny that your ever called me jahil as you have withdrawn from calling us Kafir.even if you don't deny still I won't pass any offensive remarks because I believe in healthy and humble debate not in being offensive.
May Allah show us the right path. Ameen

danish

Jun 29, 2016 13:39

In our country we have 72 firkas of different mullahs just like your vision who made translation of Quran into tafseers what i call it your own understandings ! to guide muslim umah about your FIRKA concept Some says we are wahibs some say we are al hdaess some says we are dewbandis do you know 72 fikas is the prediction of what ????? read hadis over it or you have some differences over hadis islamudeen like dewbandis firkas has.you raise a ? about my beard its not farz its hukman sunnat first tell us from which firkas u belong than i ll tell you how u interpreted quran ! i dont say it more it will hurt you ego extra genius brother !

danish

Jun 29, 2016 13:58

this is dating site where woman give kisses to men not men give kisses to boy like in kpk and further cities of pak if you like to stay in this environment your welcome or u have wasted my crucial time over your nonsense !

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Deleted User

Jun 29, 2016 17:46

when a girl told me that she is not interested .. i never send her a message again !!
it is a marriage and everyone should be 100% comfortable with his / her partner .. i dont like being get married then have to divorce !
this is not good at all

danish

Jun 30, 2016 11:03

Camel Rider Ahmed Salah its invalid discussion your about to launch here again first collect the whole story whats is exactly happen than i ll like to have you silent s**** here some ladies laboul us what is happening in your country you ppl should be call not like us moderate ppl !

danish

Jun 30, 2016 11:18

nobody is sending messages to your mother donot worry !

ALIWISEMIND ke

Sep 23, 2021 14:21

@Deleted user, great for sharing this
The best answer to me is to reply as follows;
1.If someone messaged you is far from you e.g different countries, Then the best answer if you are not interested is "I appreciate your interest but i'm prefer someone from my country" | This is best answer.

ALIWISEMIND ke

Sep 23, 2021 14:28

@irfan Ul-Haq; a bad muslim is better than a good non-muslim. Remember, the prophet says, a believer can have all bad qualities except...we are not suppossed to judge a muslim but their own faults. I also was given an example like that, you can see purely a "bad muslim" but when sb insult the religion, they feel bad and stand to defend it. They have iman inside them even if they're just muslims by "name"
Muslims are muslims however bad they are. No one shoul disrespect any muslim or be harsh on them or misjudge they. THEY ARE MUSLIMS

Islamisdeen!you have actually just given a ruling that who ever texts to opposite gender does kuffar.very well.I tell you something.
When there was a war going on in Bosnia(a former province of Serbia).pakistan army was sent there to help the Bosnian Muslims.When they got there,they found Bosnian girls wearing jeans and socializing with males openly and many of them had even got Christian boyfriends. When Pakistani people saw that then they got surprised and didn't feel good about their attitudes towards Islamic values.
When these soldiers discused that matter with their superiors then they got a very good Answer that motivated them even more to help them.
They were told that no matter if they are non practicing Muslims but don't forget that they could kill their Muslim identity to avoid from being massacred .But they didn't. They are fighting for it. They are sacrificing their lives for it.Islam is still amongst them.there is light.
I hope that some day you get eyes to see that light.because if a minor thing like texting is kuffar then Bosnian Muslims were something more than kafirs.

KhadijahCare2

Sep 24, 2021 03:32

I think we should reply even just say "Hello tq for message me, tq for compliment nme, etc, but we only can be friend because I already to be proposed by somebody else, or sorry you are too young for me, I prefer someone older than me, etc", try to answer with a good reason without hurting them.
Not replying a message is a rude behaviour, that's my opinion. If we answer with a standard answer then they will know that we are not interested to go far than just say hello.

In other dating apps we can't replying message when we both are standard member, the message only appear 7 characters, but still there are so many member not understand, they keep message me like : hello, and other message "whatsap..." even though I do make a note in my profile "Sorry I am a standard member so I can't read or reply your message" they still keep message, I don't know why ?. And I never disregard them, even I only can reply "CntRead" so they know I see their message but can't read and can't reply. That's all, never unresponse, that's rude.

ALIWISEMIND ke

Sep 24, 2021 13:11

Its good of you that you're caring and empathetic, mashaallah, even if there are barriers, you try your level best to remain faithful to your principles; May Allah reward you for that
It could have been great if most of us do the same. But, the reasoning is different; some don't respond because they don't want to "hurt them by rejection". Others are not sure if they accept or reject. Some are discouraged by the vulgar language seconded by rejection. There are those who are " testing" their patience or playing hard to get. Reasons such as "busyness," forgetfulness after deciding to respond later or technical problem may exist

But, to my knowledge, it may be painful to say you reject because of one reason or the other, they may be emotionally hurt and a bit hard to accept, but, its better to respond. It aids them in their healing not to misjudge because of lack of proper knowledge, doubting themselves ad consiquently, their self esteem...its also easier for them to decide accordingly if its age or correct themselves if its a correctable weakness

Wallahu aalam

 

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