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Question for those who don't put up a photo

Question for those who don't put up a photo

Farid Created Oct 14, 2021 03:23
15 Comments

I understand the hesitation if it has to do with privacy. This site is open to the public, so anyone with Internet access can see your profile, and your pictures. To see what I mean, just log out of the site (or use incognito mode), and try to visit your profile page. Everything is there.

Given that there is very little privacy on this site, would you feel more comfortable putting up a photo if there were privacy restrictions on it? Meaning, your photos are hidden/blurred by default. If someone wants to see them, they have to request permission from you, and you can grant access to that person, and that person only.

I'm pretty sure this site won't implement such a feature, but I'm curious to know if this type of feature is what users of a site like this would want.

 

This topic has 15 comments

Amir

Oct 15, 2021 18:40

Hopefully you'll be on WhatsApp by then. Girls usually show their photo and then delete it in a minute.

Yesterday I was on another site and by end of the day got a phone number. Now texting. Luckily she's in Indiana. Overseas really complicated things especially when it come to visa, when your girls is made to feel that consulates treat you nothing more than a worm so does she really want to become Mrs Worm?

Amir

Oct 16, 2021 02:08

Here on this site things were no different. Girls writing every 2 or 3 days like they don't have a smart phone, and only answering one question per message. No use asking them 2 questions because it will still take 2 messages.

Amir

Oct 18, 2021 19:15

Update on text: Another scammer on another site!

Amir

Oct 18, 2021 19:17

Here's the rule of thumb:

Above average photo (5+) = Scammer
Below average photo (5-) = Real

Ratna

Oct 19, 2021 22:22

A lot of scammer .. talking with a few guys and the nextday "deleted user"
They are asked email address = scammer
Acting so busy = scammer
Sweet talk with romance word = scammer

By the way not always "Below average photo (5-) = Real"
I found alot men who put photo below 5- and he is scammer.


Farid

Oct 20, 2021 03:45

I think you're confused as to what the definition of a scammer is. A scammer is someone who tries to steal money from you. Acting busy and sweet talk does not necessarily make someone a scammer.

Ratna

Oct 20, 2021 14:16

My experience.. most like that and end up ask the money

Sweet talk and acting busy is two of their skenario. Make women in love with him with his sweet talk.. and acting busy so the women think he has good job so impossible ask money frm us.



KhadijahCare2

Oct 21, 2021 06:25

I was post my real pic on this site, and I met a Psycho, so I delete all my pics, even I block him maybe he still have another account, so better to not post in public. If someone interested in me, he can ask later.

Salafi Ali

Oct 21, 2021 07:36

For me, I never allow the society to change my me. For instance, simply because a stranger insulted me, I cannot stop talking to strangers simply because they are "abusive."
If I know what scammers want is only money, period, I just don't send money to anyone unwillingly irregardless of the excuse. Blocking people, not easy, unless they are bothering me with unnecessary and irrelevant persistent messages.
@Khadijah, people are diff, and everyone has their own view, its how our brains work, uniquelly, and no point of view is superior or more right than other, am just sharing this so as we exchange ideas,
😋.

Amir

Oct 21, 2021 15:50

Ratna is only providing flags, not prosecuting. May be fake be a better word.

I have said this many times. In 7 years online I was only able to find 4 real ones. A Russian who became my fiancee. An American I dated for a year. Two Moroccans that I didn't go to visit.

In Ukraine I had a lot of luck but only in 2012 and 2013. Me and my American friend there often discussed why then and not later. His rational was that we became older. I'd say, in only 2, 3 years we became so old!?!

KhadijahCare2

Oct 22, 2021 07:37

I decided not to post my photos for security reasons, I think apart from money issues, there are other important things to pay attention to is about security.

A Psycho is more dangerous than Scammers, because the purpose of the scammer is only money, as long as we don't send money then we are safe. But a Psycho can do more, maybe our photos are used as a tool for negative imagination, and I don't want to sin with his actions.

Also, I see an opportunity on this site to be able to write messages freely. So, if someone is interested in me personally from my profile information, then he has many opportunities to message me. Then after communicating actively and feeling comfortable, we can move on to the next stage by exchanging contact numbers.

I prefer to get to know each other's faces by making video calls, so that both of us can prove who we are, are we real as we say in our profile or fake accounts, scammers or psychopaths??

On this site we still have many ways to be able to communicate freely. But on other sites where we can't send messages freely, or there is a mandatory feature to display photos, we have to follow the system.

I still think positively towards anyone without ethnic issues etc. And I also didn't give up just because I ran into some scammers and psychopaths. But I just want to increase my security, which happens to be a site that allows me to protect myself more strictly without missing the opportunity to chat with friends here.

@Salafi Ali, it's true that every human being is different, and each has their own uniqueness, and most importantly we are responsible for whatever decisions we make and do not harm others.

For me, a profile without a photo can also serve to find out if people want to approach or accept someone because of their personality or because of their physique? If it's just physical, then he won't last forever, because humans can age, they can turn into unattractive one day. Why do we meet people who will leave us one day when we grow old and sick? It's best not to start a relationship that only relies on outward appearances. This is also one reason to test someone whether he is a sincere person who loves because of the heart, because of Allah, or because of physical and status?

Btw thanks for taking the time to share your opinion. Hopefully we can add insight to each other by sharing openly with each other.

Keep the spirit, Allah will always bless us.

KhadijahCare2

Oct 22, 2021 07:37

I decided not to post my photos for security reasons, I think apart from money issues, there are other important things to pay attention to is about security.

A Psycho is more dangerous than Scammers, because the purpose of the scammer is only money, as long as we don't send money then we are safe. But a Psycho can do more, maybe our photos are used as a tool for negative imagination, and I don't want to sin with his actions.

Also, I see an opportunity on this site to be able to write messages freely. So, if someone is interested in me personally from my profile information, then he has many opportunities to message me. Then after communicating actively and feeling comfortable, we can move on to the next stage by exchanging contact numbers.

I prefer to get to know each other's faces by making video calls, so that both of us can prove who we are, are we real as we say in our profile or fake accounts, scammers or psychopaths??

On this site we still have many ways to be able to communicate freely. But on other sites where we can't send messages freely, or there is a mandatory feature to display photos, we have to follow the system.

I still think positively towards anyone without ethnic issues etc. And I also didn't give up just because I ran into some scammers and psychopaths. But I just want to increase my security, which happens to be a site that allows me to protect myself more strictly without missing the opportunity to chat with friends here.

@Salafi Ali, it's true that every human being is different, and each has their own uniqueness, and most importantly we are responsible for whatever decisions we make and do not harm others.

For me, a profile without a photo can also serve to find out if people want to approach or accept someone because of their personality or because of their physique? If it's just physical, then he won't last forever, because humans can age, they can turn into unattractive one day. Why do we meet people who will leave us one day when we grow old and sick? It's best not to start a relationship that only relies on outward appearances. This is also one reason to test someone whether he is a sincere person who loves because of the heart, because of Allah, or because of physical and status?

Btw thanks for taking the time to share your opinion. Hopefully we can add insight to each other by sharing openly with each other.

Keep the spirit, Allah will always bless us.

Salafi Ali

Oct 22, 2021 08:40

Yeah, its very true Khadijah, I dispute nothing. But what I mean't is that I personally is less affected by my environment. If I decide not to put a photo, call me fake, scammer, psychopath, whatever, I care less and its non of my business what you think of me, what matters most is who I am, not what you think I am.

Although Islam doesn't, totally, allow cheating (this is a story, a man was looking a scholar to learn from. He was directed to one. After a long journey, he reached his homestead. Sth cought his attention! "I can't learn from his, I don't trust him," he said as he goes back! But why? He saw him with some grasses to feed his horse! But, he realised that he was just using the food to attract it and catch it, not feeding! Just by that small act, he branded him a 'liar' and didn't bother to learn from him. To him, there is a possibility of mixing truth and lies in his teaching), "wise" rich people prefer to conceal their identies and pretend to be poor only to remove the "money temptation" so as they get true love.

I second that because Yaaqub told Yusuf not to share his dream with his brothers. Well, a part from the security issue you are talking of, if you are "beautiful," which fade over sometime, you may attrect men because of your looks, only to "dump" you if you get a chronic illness like Yaaqub or you age.

Whats important, my brothers and sisters, just as you have said, our actions have got consequences. So, make an informed decision, evaluating the pros and cos, have a reason behind your reasoning. If you decide whether or not to put your photo, its your decision and not because of peer or because most of the comments here are against your point of view.

Be decisive.

Ceraunophile

Oct 22, 2021 20:08

We are usually all grown up.
Mostly Muslim.
If someone is really serious you can share the pic. But these days you have to be on your own guard.
As a matter of fact how many of us would like there would be wives pic being dragged, misused or anything.
It's not the best idea to share pic on an open platform. Tbh internet isn't as safe as it may sound.
Picture if is really important use best possible safe service if not post.
Thing to consider is do you base your decision on how someone look, their are filters and tools to improve pic, I don't think it's best to base one's decision on pic.
Imagine you marry a beautiful diciver, or devil in disguise
If you think pic make a profile legit you are on coke on fools island.

Amir

Oct 23, 2021 09:32

Actually, 5 in 7 years. I forgot the Russian girl who flew from Denver to see me in Atlanta. I wanted her to stay but she left after a week.

 

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