Helahel

Do NOT day dreaming here

Do NOT day dreaming here

Faizzan Created Apr 4, 2021 06:31
125 Comments

I found most of females profile , most of them are day dreaming here ( lots of expectations)
They wants rich , well settled guy .
Remember
Remember
Remember

If a man is rich and well settled then he will never create profile on helahel.
He would have multiple and most pretty options nearby him .

So please be in reality.

 

This topic has 125 comments

Tawakul

Apr 4, 2021 18:44

Most girls lack knowledge and iman. It's all reduced to culture .

Faizzan

Apr 5, 2021 01:18

@tawakkul .. You are right

Faizzan

Apr 5, 2021 01:20

Knowledge of deen usually women have lesser than men..

Talah

Apr 6, 2021 07:04

Faizzan
منو قال لك ان النساء يعرفون عن الدين أقل من الرجال؟ شنو الدليل؟

Faizzan

Apr 6, 2021 11:53

Talah.. I can’t read it ..
Could you please write in English

AllahisgreatP

Apr 6, 2021 14:26

Are you saying all men on this platform are poor or not well settled? I don't understand you maybe you should elucidate.

Faizzan

Apr 6, 2021 14:44

All men are not poor .. most of them very well.

But as women expect,
Majority of men are struggler

Soniya

Apr 6, 2021 21:24

As a woman here, I don’t ever want to be financially dependent on any man. It’s not that I will reject my future husband’s money but I will make sure that I also have my own income. In this day and age, it’s advisable for women to make their own money because financial dependence on any man (whether dad, brother or husband) makes a woman weak. I have seen with my own eyes ...how someone in my own family feels powerless and so dependent on her husband. I only want to be dependant on GOD and never on any person.

Soniya

Apr 6, 2021 21:32

Money is power. I will make sure that I have that power so, I’m never, ever dependent on anyone even my own family. I always pray that God saves me from the dependence of people.

Abu Maryam

Apr 7, 2021 03:15

you look at their choice, and who throws them, what appetites do modern women have ))) German doctors, Norwegian engineers,, Allah forbid from women with thoughts like Sonya's

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 04:16

^you didn’t really understand my comment above. I said that I never want to be financially dependant on anyone. I want to make my own money.
First read, comprehend and then comment

Faizzan

Apr 7, 2021 07:21

As I understood women psychology in general.
Usually women who are financially empowered , follow feminist mindset ( my money, my life , my choice , my freedom etc etc )

While men who earn money always think for their family.

Abu Maryam

Apr 7, 2021 13:16

@ sonya,---I fully understand what you are talking about, and I pray to Allah that he will protect men from women like you, if you want to be independent, find a wife and not a husband ,))

No Photo

Siti

Apr 7, 2021 13:38

So men here are poor and not well settled? Your statement proves that.

Missreal

Apr 7, 2021 13:42

Is marriage really about money of cos not as long as a man can provide for a wife it's permissable to marry.. He doesn't have to be rich or something and that's what faizan meant I don't think he means poor like poor no money at all he meant most men here are let's say middle class neither rich nor poor anyway people should prioritise deen over money and on this site I think most men lack both so makes it more harder to find someone

No Photo

Siti

Apr 7, 2021 14:02

If that is the case so do not assume women are all after rich men if men here are neither rich nor poor but decent income. That is the reality.

Faizzan

Apr 7, 2021 14:08

Siti... I didn't mean poor.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 18:42

Abu Maryam... let me guess you must be from the Middle East? Different mindset then..
My post is not to create any divisions here. I’ll explain again in a very simple language because some of you didn’t get what I meant.
In this day and age, women should be able to make their own money. Too many women get caught up in an unhappy or abusive marriages and can’t leave/divorce because they don’t have an income. That is why it is strongly advisable for women to be educated and secure a good job so, they never have to be financially dependent on any man.
Even God doesn’t forbid women to be independent.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 18:52

Faizzan look up the word mohtaji (Urdu word). It’s a complex word and has a very sad meaning. I don’t think any English translation properly describes it. You can ask someone, who know the language, the true meaning of it or you can simply google “mohtaji in English”.
....I won’t wish that on anyone and money certainly frees you from someone’s “mohtaji”.

Faizzan

Apr 7, 2021 18:58

I completely understand mohtaaj..
But I know also women psychology.
Women usually become like a feminist whenever they earn thier own money..
And am. Saying this just because of experience.

Abu Maryam

Apr 7, 2021 19:19

@sonya,,it is in your society that women depend on money ,in my society that women are in the care of men and do not need anything,)) work for yourself as much as you want,

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 20:33

^Again, you don’t know what you are talking about. It is not the issue of women depending on money lol. If anything, money is power. You and I, we both know it’s true. Maybe, you should ask women in your own community how they feel every time they have to ask for their husband’s money. You will get more perspective.
What I meant is that women shouldn’t be dependent on someone else’s money in this day and age. They should get that power (money) by themselves so, they can feel the real power. This way, no man will ever be condescending or talk them down.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 20:42

Faizzan.. I can’t speak for other women.. but I know for myself that, I will be financially dependent and buy my own properties (InshAllah)... so, that I can never be dependent on any guy. Hopefully, God will save me from someone’s “mohtaji”. And I wish you the same... hopefully, God saves you too ..from people’s ”mohtaji”.
This isn’t about feminism issue.. but I’m genuinely scared of being financially dependent on anyone and I feel pity for women who actually are. I don’t ever want to be in that situation. Maybe, I have heard horror stories so this is my perspective.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 7, 2021 21:06

How's asking money from your own husband being financially dependant?? In any case Soniya I think you are talking about bad marriages. Also you have meher given to you at nikah if you would like to leave. There's of course no problem in a woman working but that's only for specific cases if need be. In a regular marriage one doesn't need to. So basically your marriage will be a power game? I wonder where will all the weak concepts like love, intimacy and trust be kept

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 21:11

Abrar, I don’t have problem asking my husband for money if I need it. But I’ll make sure that I have my own income too. Even prophet’s wife Khadijah was a business woman.
I have seen some bad marriages and I know what I’m talking about. I just think us women should be careful in this day and age...Make sure we are financially dependent.
The meher that you are talking about can’t support a woman for her lifetime so, she better be educated.
I’m sure you would want your own future daughter to have good job too.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 21:14

I’m not saying that I’ll make money to show off. Nothing to do with the competition.
I just make sure that I have my independence too.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 7, 2021 21:26

Definitely I would like all my children to be as educated as possible. But going to work when you have your man who's earning for the house might cause more problems than cure in today's day and age. Hazrat Khadija firstly had business inherited from her father, secondly the level of pardah and hijab plus the society there at that time was way too different. Plus she would many times send her male workers including the prophet to seal deals. She would follow proper hijab. Would you do that? Since you're quoting her. If you would that would be great. On the contrary you would be working to get "power". Totally different concepts. The benefits of the reasons for a woman to not work unless there's a real need might create more issues than "power" in today's day and age if there's lot of mingling from the opposite s*x and that too if your guy feels the way I do in these concepts. But if you both think alike then each to his own.
Also meher is not there to sustain her for her life. It's temporary emergency money. Like a fixed deposit.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 7, 2021 21:34

What do you need independence from? If you need independence why get married. You want to eat the apple, the pie and chicken too. Sorry I guess I forgot that proverb 😄 Just kidding. I understand what you're trying to say. But if you'll understand these concepts well, you might understand me better. Personally I would want every woman and man to be well educated so that in any case if you have a bad marriage you can get all the power you want 😛 See there are many things that go wrong when you oppose the natural roles. That's why I said understanding the concepts are important.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 7, 2021 21:37

So I just want to understand how does earning money give "independence" to a wife. And independence from what? I am assuming you're talking about survivability. Is it?

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 21:38

I don't know what to say. Maybe, I am culturally different than most of you here on this thread. Most of my aunts work. One aunty is a top gynecologist in Saudi Arabia. Another aunt is an IT Manager working for a Municipal govt here in Canada. Another one is a real estate agent in Toronto. My female cousins are doctors, professors, teachers and project managers.
Their husbands do not forbid them and they are very happy with their jobs.
I guess I look up to them for inspiration. I want to be somebody in my life...make a name for myself. I don't think its bad.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 21:41

Yes, if my marriage ever goes bad (God forbids !)..I want to be able to have a good income and a job for survivability. That means, I will never have to ask money from my family. Maybe, I am different than other women. But trust me, its not about competition.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 7, 2021 21:54

I absolutely get you. My aunt is actually a scientist in the US, saying that kinda makes me proud, hehe. Anyway I guess she's ambitious and that's a good thing and it's a good thing if you're ambitious too. But working for "power" and independence I don't understand that. I would still argue it's better if paid more attention to their roles. Some westerners feel the same way too. If women paid more attention in educating and working on their family and men paid more attention on getting the money, thing's would be just perfect. As I mentioned this system has more benefits than the other one. Not that it's wrong of course not. But please don't do it because of shallow concepts like "power", "independence" etc. If you're ambitious and want to help out your family (which actually the guy should be completely responsible for) then it's still understandable.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 21:57

Also, when you said that there is a lot of intermingling between men and women in a workplace...it is true. I agree with you.
But no matter what, if a woman is faithful to her husband, she will not pursue another relationship whether at work or if she's just a housewife. That depends on a woman herself, her character.
I know some burka clad housewives who have cheated on their husbands whereas, dress wearing working women are very, very faithful.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 7, 2021 22:01

It's not about women cheating. It's about men getting jealous 😄 or even women getting jealous for that matter. That's why I am saying try and know these concepts. Islam is perfectly calibrated to human nature. You need to forget western concepts.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 22:01

When I said power....I meant in the general sense....that money is power. It applies to both men and women.
Ultimately, if I work OR you work,..,,you and I will have that "power". I am not competing with you and neither are you. We just both want to be financially secure.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 22:03

Abrar...some men can be frugal lol
I know.. Islam says that men should buy their wives stuff but many men nowadays are extremely frugal lol.
Just saying.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 22:03

But I get what you are saying

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 7, 2021 22:04

I still cannot understand this concept of the one who earns has power. What kind of power? Soniya I would suggest you to question western concepts when you speak about them.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 22:06

Abrar,,,so aren't rich people more powerful than poor?
I am not talking about spirituality or faith here...but in terms of money...
You are saying...money isnt power?
Lets just all be honest here.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 7, 2021 22:07

Yup. True. So do istikhara. Try to select the best guy. Keep your intentions clean and pure. Look for important qualities. It's a collective process. Still one might end up with a crappy marriage. Well maybe then it's a test from Allah. Try to paas the test then. Because paradise could be waiting for you. But if you go for trivial western pleasures. Meh 😄

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 7, 2021 22:08

No Iam saying how does a husband have more power than a wife when he's earning?

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 22:09

Who has more power? Me or Bill Gates/Mukesh Ambani? lol (Just being humorous now)
But obviously, they are only humans and who knows, I may be a better human being than them....but in this materialistic modern world....they have definitely more power than me. I am just being real.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 22:11

your comment..."No Iam saying how does a husband have more power than a wife when he's earning?"
Its good that you have a very innocent thinking. But sadly, some men actually believe they have the power over their women when they work. Like I said, I know some women in horrible marriages and the stories they tell me.

Missreal

Apr 7, 2021 22:26

I think as women it's best advised to be homemakers and I don't find anything wrong with that still depends on where you are and the culture there of cos, but still if a woman wants to study and work nothing wrong with that either as long as you respect your husband and fulfill all your wifely duties no problem with working and earning money.. But when the working becomes a hindrance in your marriage its better to think twice I know of many career women who can't survive in most marriages because of their mindset anyway the world has made people believe money is Power and so everyone is running after the dollars but we tend to forget what our real purpose is on earth.. I am not against women working and getting the dollars but watch your family and take care of your home that's the most important duty a Muslim woman should be thinking about..

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 7, 2021 22:27

Haha. Yes. But you need to question these concepts maybe discussing them to the core will help you find more answers. Do think about it when you have the answer on "how does the guy have more power"? And if he thinks that way and if you need to feel as powerful as him in a marriage then sister you're already living in a wrong marriage. You better opt out. But if you prefer living in a bad marriage with power well then that's your choice. Trust me sister you won't be able to fix this by earning money. A bad marriage is something you focus on bettering. Although I still need to know the answer to my question😄

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 7, 2021 22:29

I think missreal put it perfectly. These are certain good concepts that can save marriages Soniya trust me. Western concepts are garbage. I hope you realize that one day before it's too late.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 22:30

Yes Missreal.. Different cultures and different life experiences.
I personally don't think its wrong for me to work or make a name for myself. I truly believe....money is power (sorry if it sounds harsh but it is true in THIS materialistic world). With the money, I can make sure that I am able to send my future kids to the top universities like Harvard or MIT. Yes, it was my dream to go to MIT but I don't come from financially rich family.
Although, its good to not to run after money all the time because its not everything.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 22:34

Abrar..I answered your question.
Some men think they have the power because they have money. For example, rich men with poor wives. Obviously not all think like that but some. I am sure you can agree with me on that.
I want to be equal to my future husband. I am not saying that I will feel superior to him and I hope he won't either (if hes making more than me).

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 22:36

Abrar....if I am so wrong...then how come some rich western men basically "buy" wives from third world countries. Do you think those rich western men ever feel that their third world wives are equal to them?

Missreal

Apr 7, 2021 22:37

I wish you all the best in that but for me I think my only dream is for my kids to study deen fully not against universities and secular knowledge but deen is so important that it will save you from many fitna on earth and of cos in the hereafter it will help more.. But I really wish you All the best Sonia just don't give up

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 22:38

Thank you Missreal
I wish you all the best too

Missreal

Apr 7, 2021 22:43

Sonia not all the western men buy women from the third world country they go there because most third world countries women know how to treat men well and most men can't stand extreme feminism and you will be surprised they end up in happy and successful marriages, of cos some it's true they buy wives and treat them bad but most do treat their wives well and it's because of the respect the women have.. We can never be equal to men trust me they will alwys be the head and we the neck but all we can do is respect them and they in return respect us

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 23:07

I didn’t say all western men buy wives from the third world. I encourage all women (no matter what nationality, whether from the first world or a third world ) to be financially independent. Feminism of the western world isn’t so bad. It just means women and men are equal. There are definitely problems in the west but so are in the east. But arguably, west is better for women than the east. All women regardless of the race/religion are protected in the west. This can’t be said about some eastern countries.
Yes, men and women are different but still equal. Men tend to be more risk takers/brave and women empathetic/nurturing. But we are still equal.. just have different qualities. And we need each other because of our differences.

Soniya

Apr 7, 2021 23:20

I want you to all to google images of “Iran in the 60s”, “Pakistan in the 60s”, “Kabul in the 60s”. Look how cheerful/independent those women look and men were so supportive. But sadly, the corrupt govts/religious clerics messed up those countries and introduced archaic Arabic customs like black burka etc. I’m glad, many Pakistani women don’t wear them. It’s not our culture

Abu Maryam

Apr 8, 2021 02:05

,/@ sonya,again I repeat, being under the care and protection of a husband is a mercy of Allah that you are deprived of, and you will never be under the care of a husband as long as power is money for you, " money is power "is your personal opinion, dirty and vicious, in my society women are under the care and protection of men )) what can only dream of such as you ,, may Allah protect , from such women as you ,

Soniya

Apr 8, 2021 02:48

^you see everyone.. this is how some men from the Middle East talk to women here. Very, very rude. You either can’t comprehend basic English or are really that rude. I could care less if some illiterate/tribal man doesn’t marry me because of my viewpoints...I don’t need his mercy lol.. thank you very much..
I’ll be married off to a nice, educated man.
I am not going to argue with you anymore. I rest my case.

Abu Maryam

Apr 8, 2021 02:57

))) an educated engineer from Norway .do what you want, better buy yourself a husband, money is power

Soniya

Apr 8, 2021 03:06

You may have a Norwegian nationality but your thinking is certainly backwards.
Your English skills are limited too so, you didn’t really understand what I meant by “money is power”.

Abu Maryam

Apr 8, 2021 03:15

The power belongs to Allah ☝ ️

Takwa

Apr 8, 2021 03:49

I understand you soniya

Soniya

Apr 8, 2021 03:59

Thanks Takwa, of course you understand. You are Turkish and not Arab, hence you are open minded.
I like Turkish serials and the portrayal of Turkish women is very nice and modern.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 8, 2021 04:32

Soniya you seem to love the west even more than some proper white westerners 😄 They've already woken up to the hypocrisy my friend. By the way south Africa has the highest number of rape cases in the world.

Soniya

Apr 8, 2021 04:44

South Africa is not a western country. It’s not even considered a first world country due to the political tension there.
Western countries are the UK, Scandinavian countries, Central Europe, the US and Canada. (Australia and New Zealand are considered western because of the British roots even though they are on the other side of the world).
I am Canadian so, of course I am proud to be one. We are diverse people of all skin tones here... so, your remark “you seem to love the west more than proper white westerns” is frankly belittling. Just because I am brown ..I can’t be a proper Canadian?
Thats the beauty of being Canadian... no racism and I’m accepted here.

Soniya

Apr 8, 2021 05:08

Just google images of “Pakistan in the 60s”, “Iran in the 60s”, “Afghanistan in the 60s”. So modern and peaceful. Women dressed as how they pleased and held jobs. So liberalism is not necessarily a western concept but our own eastern countries were like that once upon a time. Sadly, after General Zia ul Haq introduced religious fundamentalism in Pakistan, it all went downhill. For Iran, it was the removal of the Shah, the country went in the hands of the religious fundamentalists. For Kabul, it was after the Soviet invasion... it got all messed up there.
Good for the Turkish people fighting fundamentalism and Arabic culture. Or else they will become just like the above countries.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 8, 2021 08:46

Soniya Im sorry but I don't think so my line was to offend you. I said that since you're definitely not a pure race white westerner. Which you aren't. 💁‍♂️

In Islam you have free will, dress as you please or not dress at all or work wherever do whatever. If Allah wanted to force and control us so many people wouldn't be doing zina or other crazy things.
By Western countries I meant non Islamic ruling. And non of the top 10 are islamic ruling. Liberalism IS a western concept.
Okay here's a question for you by which I guess I'll get all my answers. Which society would you prefer to live in all your life; A completely gloomy grey Islamic society governed by "islamic laws" where you abide by pure Islamic rules for everything OR (drum roll 🥁)

The WESTERN SOCIETY! 💸💰🤳🥳🥳🎉🎊
A world where you can do anything you wish for be anyone you like and do anything you please. (Including bombing children and rotting the Muslims so that their society and culture doesn't grow)
So, which one will you choose?

P.S. Sorry if I gave you a guilt trip with piles dead children's bodies.

Farid

Apr 8, 2021 18:45

We shouldn't paint an entire race with the same brush. Every groups has its good and bad.

Soniya

Apr 8, 2021 19:54

Abrar, I shouldn't have said that your comment was belittling. I thought you meant that I can't have such views because I am non-white.
Anyways, to answer your question....the mess in the middle east is not just the fault of the foreign invasion but also their own archaic tribal governments'. You certainly can't deny that. We shouldn't just blame the foreign invasion/interference but also look at ourselves too.
I gave you examples of Iran, Afghanistan and Pakistan. It was mainly the fault of the corrupt local govts. Believe me, I have read many articles and talked to old people and they tell me 50, 60s, 70s was a good time in Pakistan. In fact, it was a liberal and clean country. Women were safe etc.
Also, I am not necessarily talking about the States and the UK (They seem to be the only ones interfering in the world affairs).
But look at Scandinavian countries and Canada/Australia. They haven't invaded any country in the middle east. Some of the happiest people are in the Scandinavian countries and they are highly liberal. Given a choice, I would pick Canada/Scandinavian countries, (where I am free to seek an education, drive, hold a job, protected under the law, safe from racism/discrimination, can get a maternity leave, can have a passport) .... than say reside in Saudi or any gulf countries.

Soniya

Apr 8, 2021 20:10

And I am glad that I currently live in Canada. Thank God, my parents picked Canada over gulf countries or Saudi to immigrate to for better opportunities.
Everyone is equal and safe here under the law. This can't be said about many middle eastern countries.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 9, 2021 07:13

So what I am asking you is not wether you will reside in Arab countries, I asked you wether you live in a country with Islamic laws.
Secondly, Invading is the last nail in the coffin. A country is stronger when it's economic is strong. They make a puppet and that puppet destroys the economy of his own country then they invade to loot.
The whole system is created by the west to destroy Islam from the face of the earth. I agree the government (not all the clerics) are sell outs and it has also happened in the past. So you're questioning the clerics (Saddam, Gaddafi. These dudes weren't clerics) that it's their fault and not the system created by the west to destroy Islam from the face of the earth? How do you defend the killings that are happening now? What are they doing now?
What about Israel? No clerics there.
The Scandinavian countries don't need to indulge in war. Why will they? Europe is controlled by one union. US is a pawn that does the dirty work. Europe is their region obviously they'll protect it.
No one is free Soniya. You all are slaves. You just don't see it. Democracy, liberalism are made up words to give you hope that you're free and independent. In Iran people were going away from Islamic laws and were becoming more western (which is what you prefer).
Also, please don't be offended by this I am just speaking by logic. Since you don't want to live with Islamic laws, why don't you become a non believer?
Lastly there are peaceful Muslim countries like Indonesia and Malaysia.
I would just say that my friend you right now have a lot to learn and unlearn a lot of things. The world isn't how you think it is. You're very innocent and it becomes easier for them.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 9, 2021 08:58

Plus there are tonnes of backward retarded things about the western culture that I could list. An endless list.

Soniya

Apr 9, 2021 19:20

The reason, I am using Middle East as an example because many Muslim countries are following their customs. It wasn’t necessarily that Iran was turning very western but they were protecting their culture from turning Arabic.
Even before the foreign invasion in the middle-east... you really think they were following the Islamic law? It was still primitive. Useless tribal wars, constant civil unrest, Sheesha/hookah smoking, belly dancing (so degrading), mistreatment of foreigners/domestic workers from the poor nations, harsh prison sentences for low crimes, black burka, preventing women from seeking education, forcing young girls to marry much older men, some arab sheikhs marrying more than 3 wives for the wrong reasons, mistreatment of innocent animals.... Tell me, is this Islamic law? I think not...
I never said I won’t live by the Islamic rules. Islam doesn’t prevent women to be independent or make their own money. It wants women to feel empowered and certainly not in black burka. Not only that... it is against any mistreatment of vulnerable people. Islam encourages advancements in science, technology and medicine. Not many Muslim countries are practising that with the exception of very few.
Once upon a time, there used to be a golden age in the Middle East. Where is it now? Still all the blame goes to the foreign invasion?
Anyways, you have your own views and I have my own.

Soniya

Apr 9, 2021 19:36

Now to play fair, I’ll list some of the negatives of the west. I’m not talking in the political sense here just normal everyday things.
- more individualistic society than family oriented.
-long working hours
- less spiritual than the east.
-high divorce rate.

Soniya

Apr 9, 2021 19:57

I want to share something. When I was a kid in Pakistan...we had new neighbours, who just moved in recently. My mom wanted to welcome them and give them a house warming gift. They refused the gift because they said they were “wahabis”. Now, tell me ..is that Islam?
I asked my mom what does a “wahabi” mean?.. she said it’s some weird belief system from Saudi Arabia. And the neighbors were Pakistani, not arab. We came to a realization that Pakistan was adopting these weird Arabic customs. Those Arabic customs are certainly not Islamic.
This is what Iran was protecting itself from.. Arabic culture.

Abu Maryam

Apr 9, 2021 23:02

Western countries owe all their development to Muslim countries,for centuries they have plundered Muslims, their natural and human resources,and this continues to this day, what kind of justice and equality are you talking about ? North America is built on the bones of Indians and indigenous peoples, barbarians from Europe have been killing, burning, robbing and raping local peoples for centuries, the stability that you are talking about is built on the blood of millions of Indians, there is no need to tell tales about equality,,)) such false Muslims as you run away there to Kafir countries to live as Kafirs live, everyone gets what to strive for, ))

Abu Maryam

Apr 9, 2021 23:08

there are no Wahabis, this is a lie, there are uneducated followers of Western debauchery like you, who call observant Muslims Wahabis,)) you do not have enough education , and talking about Islam is confusing with the customs and culture of some countries ,,

Soniya

Apr 9, 2021 23:48

^Yes, so I guess life (for a foreigner) in Saudi Arabia, UAE and gulf countries ( with low index of human rights) is way better than Canada... right? The way those shieks or whatever you call them from some Gulf countries...treat poor Indonesian maids or foreigners from poor countries is all good .. right?
Btw, I actually said Islam is different than what most middle eastern countries practice. I am more so talking about the Arabic culture and not Islam. That’s why I said.. I’d rather live in the west, where I am respected and free from any discrimination. Your own comment shows how much different you are than me ...because of your Arabic background. Does Islam actually say that you should speak to women so disrespectfully like how you are talking to me right now (even if you disagree with my views) ?

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 00:20

Also, the atrocities in the North America happened like a century ago... before any proper constitution or the concept of human rights. Canadian govt personally apologized to the indigenous people for all the mistreatment. University education is free for the Indigenous people here in Canada as a reparation.
Now compare.. Canada to gulf countries or Saudi Arabia...
No concept of human rights in the gulf countries or Saudi. Many foreigners from the poor nations are still mistreated there.., such things are unheard here in Canada now.

Abu Maryam

Apr 10, 2021 02:56

I'm talking to you as you deserve, you look at yourself in the mirror and then talk about Islam and Islamic values, your appearance shows what a Muslim you are,, I repeat once again your Christian brothers have been making wars and plundering the countries of Islam for 1400 years , since the last Prophet , peace and blessings of Allaah be upon Him, all the benefits that the Kafir country in which you hid owes to Muslims, Islam is one brought by the prophet peace and Blessings of Allaah be upon Him,and there is no other Islam, Canadians have apologized to indigenous peoples ????))))), Oh, what are you saying ???))) how did they apologize?? oh guys, I'm sorry, for centuries we have cut you , killed, raped and sold your women, burned your children, and completely exterminated you, built this kafir country on your bones, and now let's be friends))))??? is that how they apologized ?? and who will apologize to the Muslims ?? how many years have they been robbing, killing children, innocent people in Muslim countries,, ??? when you sleep sweetly in your soft crib, know that your crib stands on the bones and blood of millions,, remember this ,, ☝ ️

Abu Maryam

Apr 10, 2021 03:08

in Saudi Arabia, the rights and norms of Sharia, human rights came up with what would be free to practice homosexuality, Lesbianism, go naked, drink alcohol and visit brothels, that's the whole truth of the , human rights, and bombmt Muslims overseas can they have no human rights,,

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 03:28

You constantly bring up the atrocities of the west.. So, no middle eastern countries have ever committed any atrocities? Are you all innocent? Just look at how your arab brethren treat poor Indonesian/Philippino maids and foreigners from the developing countries in the gulf countries/Saudi. Is that also the work of the westerners? Sure, westerners are not all innocent but your arab brothers should also look at themselves in the mirror too and think critically. They are not free from the faults.

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 03:30

The fact that you are talking to me so disrespectfully proves my point... that sadly, many men from the Middle East are afraid of any woman with an opinion.

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 03:36

Also, modern Canadians have nothing to do with the atrocities that happened in the past. Sure their ancestors may have been involved in the past but right now, all the govt can do is apologize and move forward, rather than sulk in the past.
Also, you seem to forget that it was Canada who accepted thousands of Syrian refugees and gave them a nice apartment (albeit temporary but still nice) and an allowance of $2000 per month for each Syrian refugee.

Abu Maryam

Apr 10, 2021 03:41

your comparison of the oppression of migrant workers and the atrocities of your Western countries is not very correct , your opinion is only an opinion and nothing more, and the facts remain unchanged, the Western garbage dump with freedoms, where women are on display and sold, where migrants are also oppressed and their rights are violated,

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 03:45

You have your own views. I have my own.

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 03:48

Funny thing is.. you mentioned that you live in Norway... if it’s so bad in the west then why don’t you move to the Middle East?
Isn’t that hypocrisy?

Abu Maryam

Apr 10, 2021 03:53

modern Canadians should remember that everything they have is built on blood and bones, and they can move forward on their ass, and on the right, and on the left, but this will not change the history of this country, oh, how touching Canada received refugees, it is also part of the coalition of armed forces that attacked the Middle East, oh, what a dramatic story, on the one hand to kill and drive people, and on the other to accept refugees and advertise them to the whole world, brilliant, isn't it ))

Abu Maryam

Apr 10, 2021 03:59

Fortunately, I do not live in Norway and would never want to live there, although I have the opportunity, I feel good in my homeland, I am happy here in Islam , my happiness is in Islam and not in the country of residence,

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 04:15

Canadian govt refused to join the invading coalition in the Iraqi conflict. Although they still participated in the war to help build the nation. This was during early 2000s.
We currently have a liberal prime minister Justin Trudeau who wants to keep peace with the Middle East and muslims. You can just google him and read about his policies.

Abu Maryam

Apr 10, 2021 04:25

Canada was part of the coalition that attacked the Muslims under the name of fighting terrorism and was on the territory of Iraq until January 2020, what if you do not have enough happiness on your lands there ???)) what are your dogs doing on our land ?? live in your own kafir garbage dumps and don't come here to us,,

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 10, 2021 05:29

Soniya you forget about who follows those Muslim countries. Everyone knows Saudi is a pawn. So you're saying you will live by islamic laws?
My friend you need to READ about the history of Iran. The short skirts etc. Stuff in the 60s. Short skirts is not Islamic so they were turning western and that's when intervention had to come in. Protecting the culture😂 what's wrong with you man? You mean becoming more unislamic? Why do you make up your own history? Wearing skirts was their culture? Arabic is not a culture it's a race. What's primitive? Another word you heard on a Facebook post. I'll give another one. Archaic. So what do you mean by primitive? Primitive in English means first of its age or being the first. So those Irani's were following the first of Islam. Which means how it was followed at the time of our prophet (saw) AND YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT??? Wow Soniya! Bravo! Now you'll say no you don't but we all know what you feel about it? Let's see if you're really honest that you'll say what your heart feels.
A woman can't be empowered in a black burka???
A woman can't be educated and a scientist in burka?? Jeez. You're so lost may Allah guide you sis.
Women like you ruin it for other women. May Allah guide you my friend.
Belly dancing? Please don't let me even get started on how the west sexualises women. It degrades them. Nudity. No regard for all those things.
Anyway 😄 it's like explaining stuff to a child. I don't even feel like explaining to you.
Civil unrest, tribal unrest. Another word you heard from CNN or Facebook.
As I told you before the civil unrest and all the crap was brought by your lovely west to wipe Islam from the face of the earth. In any case Islam is perfect, there could be bad people ruining it and I don't deny that. Muslims are in a tough state now some of it is their doing too.
It's hilarious when you write the to be fair points 😂😂 and give me 3 cute points about how bad west is.
Do you even realise what's going on in the world Soniya and who's running it and who's wanting Islam to be wiped out from the face of the earth?
Or are you too busy loving the west.
If you really wanted to talk about the good Islamic countries you would've talked about Indonesia and Malaysia and other small countries. Also why don't you live there if you really want an Islamic environment? 98% Muslims if I am not wrong. All peaceful. Sounds perfect.

Muslims are not in a good state right now and it's mostly because of the west partly their fault but majorly it's how the west does it a d not a word from a coward like you on that? Let's me know a lot about you. Your self indulgence will be accounted for. Everything we do is accounted for.
Focus more on how to please your creator as much as possible. You have bought in the western agenda because you're weak Soniya. Because it's easy. Life was never easy. There will always be bad people around, but what gets me is when you defend the west and talk crap about Muslim countries the crap that your own people have bought. You have a lot to learn. But I don't think so it matters to you. You're happy where you are. As long as you're happy who cares what's going on. 👍
Final question, do you wear jeans?


Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 05:49

Listen Abrar... this whole argument between me and abu Maryam started because he hated my comment, “ I want to make my own money and not be dependent on any man”. How’s this wrong? He has been making rude comments to me.. which I basically attributed to his middle eastern culture. Middle eastern men in general tend to hate opinionated women. He is not the only one who I have faced but many arab men are extremely rude whenever they don’t agree with my view points. That’s why, I brought up the whole middle eastern topic. It was never my intention to bring up politics and war.
Also, I suggest you better speak to me in a polite manner. I don’t even have a Facebook account... I’m well educated and I know colleagues from Iran, Afghanistan, Turkey etc. Canada is a multicultural country so, here you are bound to meet people of various cultures. I listen to their experiences and I do my research too. I’m not some illiterate person who knows nothing about Middle East so, you better watch your tone here.
Also, Iran is not arab and majority of Iranians/Turkish/Albanians/Pakistanis/Bosnians etc. don’t want to have Arabic culture instilled into them. Islam is not an Arabic culture.

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 05:53

Burka is not Islamic but arabic. Why must women of non-arab ethnicity be forced to wear them? I have nothing against it. Majority of Pakistani women don’t even wear it. Why? Because not part of our culture.
If some Iranian women wore mini skirts in the 60s.. that is not your place to tell them not to wear. It was their choice and only they are answerable to Allah.

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 06:01

Btw, I have no problem living in Pakistan now if it goes back to how it was in the 50s, 60s, 70s before General Zia Ul Haq introduced Arabic customs and fundamentalism into the country.
Sure, it was still not a first world country but it was developing fast.

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 06:10

When I said Arabic culture.. I meant culture of Arab people, which I thought was quite obvious. I know arab is a race and not a culture, so no need to be condescending.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 10, 2021 06:35

So what was wrong with my tone? You wear a burka or whatever. You do your hijab. Cover yourself with a tin foil. But it should follow the hijab guidelines. No honestly I see you have no idea how things work. And if that upsets you then you probably have never been in an intellectual discussion. Me telling you Arab is a a race not culture is condescending? Really Soniya is that fair?? That you're making me the villian now? That I am being rude. I am I actually condescending you and talking badly with you? Is this what a guy talking badly looks like?
That's what happens when you don't have real facts to claim your discussion. You can be offended by anything.
Talking with your Turkish friends doesn't necessarily mean you're knowledgeable or understand how things work. It shows the points you make in your discussion.

See Islam doesn't forces anyone. One can run naked with cheese spread all over. Allah won't stop you 😂 if you're not following Islamic guidelines it clearly shows what's important to you in life.
And I am not judging anyone. Each to their own. But if you train hard everyday. Train at exactly 6 am for a year without any breaks, it shows what's important to you right? Similarly if you're wearing skirts, it show's what's important to you. This world is a test, not a joyride. Joyride is jannah. There one can run naked 😄 But this is a examination hall a test where the one who controls his urges more will be rewarded more. You choose. No one will question your choices but it shows a great deal about the person or people.
And what upsets people in this day and age where Muslims are Hunted and greatly persecuted one assumes mulsims to be more inclined to the relegion. But alas some can't resist the glitter and glam and love the acceptance the west gives them while killing their brothers and sisters.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 10, 2021 06:47

Also my dear sister understand that if a woman has a fully functional working normal husband she doesn't need to work. Technically and logically also it doesn't fit right. I have a member who earns the money part so why should I? Of you're marriage gets bad till the time you get a job live on the mehr money. Save that money don't spend it on dresses and caramel lattes 😄 you're already. There you go. Islam has provided you with the solution, given you your empowerment. If you're ambitious in your career or you want to contribute to the family if things need to be that's fine. But why do you have to earn money for yourself? Your man can do the same then? Keep all his hard earned money to himself.
But if you want to earn to feel some power, which you still haven't put into words, then that's putting a man down. Basically someone who's so small that they need money to look bigger and better.
Another reason that could cause issues in marriages. Plus men are very jealous creatures.
Do why create all the fuss when you have zero logical reasons except to feel powerful and show the other person powerless. Basically a power show not a marriage.
So again. How will you in this situation feel empowered when you already have everything? 🤔

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 10, 2021 06:56

Also when you talk about let them wear skirts have you ever questioned that part? Why do women wear skirts? Exactly Talk like this changes my mind about you when you say I have great knowledge etc.

Question things Soniya. Question everything. Good or bad. What might seem great to you might not be that great or visa versa. Read more genuine sources. And how do you do that? It's with experience and trial and error. Once your into something you will know which sources speak facts. You might even read the wrong stuff initially but that's just the process of getting to the right information. I myself am still learning a lot of things , still trying to be a better human. Have myself done a lot of crap, I regret that I wish I had the sense earlier. Anyway good luck sis! Remember to question everything!

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 07:16

You said, “women like you ruin it for other women”... seemed like a personal attack.
I have never made personal comments against anyone here. Yes, I have criticized some cultures but never attacked anyone personally.
Anyways, I’m not forcing my views on you. You have your own views and I have my own.

Faizzan

Apr 10, 2021 07:49

Sonia is suffering from Westrowirus 🤣🤣😂😂
If a Muslim man living in Western country and practices islam then according to sonia kinda people he is still backward...

According to sonia... He must have girlfriends, he must go to the pub and have drink every night and he must hook up with any random girl..

Then he'll be considered as modern...

Oh sonia... 🤣🤣😜😜😜😜😜😜

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 08:23

No Faizzan, you have got this all wrong.
I’m actually a very simple person. I don’t drink or encourage any Muslim to drink or go to a bar etc.
What I’m trying to say is that sadly, many muslim countries are not practicing real Islam. Real Islam doesn’t forbid women to seek an education or a job. It doesn’t forbid women to feel empowered. Also, Islam encourages us to treat others with kindness and also to show compassion to innocent animals. All these things are sadly missing in many Muslim countries.

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 08:31

I am not praising the negative things of the western culture like alcoholism or promiscuity. But good things like the concept of human rights, anti-racism laws, anti-child labour laws, equality of men and women under the court of law, job security, employee benefits, showing compassion to innocent animals etc.

Faizzan

Apr 10, 2021 08:33

Sonia... Probably you don't know the meaning of empowered.
You still think that in Islamic country woman live in house only...

You must travel Islamic countries you must see how Muslim women control big position in mnc..

Yes Islamic allows women to do business and live freely.

But it doesn't mean, wear short skirt or live in bikni..
There is huge different between empowerment and s*x object...

Your definition of empowerment is lead women as a s*x object only.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 10, 2021 08:36

There's no attacking here Soniya. I am sure we all have better ways to attack. I said and still say it women like you make it harder for other women and Muslims because of such a mindset that really nice solid women also get criticized for no reason. I basically said you're a a REASON for stuff that ruins other people. It's an opinion about you. An attack would be abusing, or being racist. Now if someone so easily claims this as an attack to show themselves the better person and the other as a villian it clearly again proves the previous statements. How you conduct yourself is a very clear reflection of you. It's so easy to say attack! Jeez 🤦🏻‍♂️ in my previous comments twice you also agreed that my claims were mistook by you as an attack. Are you fishing for one?
Cmon Soniya have some conscious please. Every discussion turns out this way. How stupid can someone be to claim everything as an attack. Pathetic! Ah millennials!🤦🏻‍♂️ it's sad to see what the world and Muslims are becoming.
May Allah guide you and bless you sis. Take care!

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 08:37

When did I ever say that a modern woman is supposed to be a s*x object? If anything, all I did was encouraged women to seek an education and a job. If they don’t want to work then that’s fine.
Yes, I mentioned to Abrar that if Iranian women wore mini skirts in the 60s then it was their choice. No man or woman has a right to tell them otherwise because they are answerable to God only. It is their choice to wear them or not.

Faizzan

Apr 10, 2021 08:40

You are justifying western culture

While the truth is.

*in Western culture weomen consider as s*x object

*you are talking about child right
While the truth is Western countries is main consumer of child s*x market. ( read about pizza gate)

*you are talking about Racism law in West

While western countries are major Race abuser.
Racism in Asia or Africa is is lesser than western countries.

*and if you talk about gender equality in Western way. It's purely and core issue of LGBT community.. It mean now gender quality matter dealing by gay people

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 08:44

Abrar, I still have no idea why my comments are considered so controversial. Listen, if you don’t want your future wife/daughter to work then go ahead. I can’t stop you.
But Islam doesn’t forbid women to feel empowered whether by earning their own income or seeking a higher education. Once again, it’s not that they are trying to compete with their husbands.. but wanting to feel empowered for their own self esteem. How is that wrong? Anyways, you have your own opinion and I can’t force my opinions on you...just like you can’t either.

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 08:54

Faizzan, not all western countries are the same. I’m sure those horrific things that you mentioned above probably happen in some western countries.
But I’m specifically talking about Canada. We have anti-racism laws here meaning if someone is being a racist to me and calling me slurs... he/she can literally go to prison. If an employer abuses me and pays me less just because of my gender or race... he/she can get fined by the govt. I’m sure there are bad things happening here too but they are certainly against the law.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 10, 2021 09:25

It's okay sis. It's something you didn't understand. Of course I have no problem in women working. But the fact is that you don't question anything, just like sheep in a herd agree to whatever being fed to them. You're extremely defensive Soniya. Never did I stop you from giving your opinion. I don't know why you even said that. Jeez. Anyway, bless you sis and may you be guided by Allah from your naivity.
And it's still okay to run naked in cheese. 😛
They will feed you words like offended, empowerment, Liberty, democracy 😄 they mean nothing these are just illusions. These are not opinions these are facts 😉
Question everything! Even Allah says that.

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 09:40

I actually wasn’t being defensive. I was just wondering why my comments or views were considered controversial....

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 10, 2021 10:09

You're saying your not being defensive but actually you are 😄 Not controversial my friend kinda sheep like. The herd mentality. You clearly haven't put lot of thought in things. Most of them don't. That's why I suggested you to question everything. What fun will I get arguing or belittling you 💁‍♂️ any witch ways. Take care

Faizzan

Apr 10, 2021 13:30

Sonia... Don't try to be more Westerner than real Western people... 🤣🤣😜😜

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 19:49

Not everyone will think the same as you Abrar. The only countries that I criticized were few middle eastern countries because of their culture. Islam is not Arabic culture.
Also, I didn’t praise everything about the western culture just the good things. I feel like I’m repeating the same thing over and over.

Soniya

Apr 10, 2021 19:52

Now if you take my above comment as being defensive then that’s up to you. This is a free site and people have diverse views, just saying.

Abrar Qureshi

Apr 11, 2021 05:14

I am sure you did. I was the idiot actually here . Apologies.

Nur

Apr 11, 2021 05:21

بياض الله وجهاك

Soniya

Apr 11, 2021 07:54

That’s ok Abrar.

Ali abu huod

Apr 11, 2021 12:49

Alsslamualykum
In the beginning, everyone must know that the man is the one who should be based on the woman’s command, and that a woman has the right to have her own business, but without entering the men's market, as Mrs. Khadija used to do.

Ali abu huod

Apr 11, 2021 12:50

As for those who want to have their own name in the labor market, they must review themselves

Ali abu huod

Apr 11, 2021 12:52

Mrs. Khadija was a merchant, but while she was in her house, she entrusted people she trusted with the men's business, as she did with the Prophet before marrying him

Ali abu huod

Apr 11, 2021 12:53

I do not know his princes, one of the first preferences that went out to the men's market for work

Ali abu huod

Apr 11, 2021 12:54

Islam urges women to admit and stay in their home, not to compete with men in their work

Ali abu huod

Apr 11, 2021 12:56

Read if you like Surat Al-Nisa ', and you know what a woman’s right and limits are

Ali abu huod

Apr 11, 2021 13:00

As for the subject of the main discussion, this is due to the woman and her way of thinking
I spoke with his woman from this site and everything was going well, but the difference in culture and the feeling of fear of the simplest things was the most apparent thing in her mentality, so I was not able to move forward with her and that affected me a lot

Ali abu huod

Apr 11, 2021 13:06

I tell men and women also that you must know the limits of your capabilities and speak accordingly, because the relationship that is established for the sake of money does not last long, but what lasts is the relationship for the sake of Allah
The Prophet Muhammad said, "So you have the same religion, you raised your hands, meaning you got a lot of good." He said to women and guardians, if someone came to you that you would like his religion and character, then marry him

Ali abu huod

Apr 11, 2021 13:08

Sorry, if there are some errors in the writing, I am writing through a translation program, but I think that what I mean has arrived
Thank you for your upscale style

 

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