When to have Nikah after finding the right person?

When to have Nikah after finding the right person?

Fatma yabancı Created Feb 22, 2020 16:00

How soon should nikah be taken when you have found the right person?Also from the women's point of view should she drop everything, school or job, immediately, to marry the man? Or should she complete her studies or job?


This topic has 11 comments

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Deleted User

Feb 23, 2020 07:12

It depends on the woman's beliefs. A man should not make a decision for his wife. We live in 2020, not the stone age

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Deleted User

Feb 23, 2020 11:06

All depends on understanding and age, a lot of us here are not here for dating, most are here to find their better half to complete their deen. So, i believe all this would have been put into consideration. Cos, it is likely you move out of your comfort zone when you meet the right person. And also, this is one of the reason some want someone from their country and state so that things will be easy for them. And again job can be drop, but studies can't. So, you have to understand each other and give each other time to finish things before Nikkah, and why doing that, their should not be room for fornication for people leaving close by cos Islam did not support that. All in all, understanding matters.

Ma salam

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Deleted User

Mar 7, 2020 00:17

It's simple according to our beloved Prophet, prayers and peace be upon him. Nikah should take place when both the man and women believe they are ready. This is not rocket surgery. Islam is easy. What our Prophet, prayers and peace be upon him, gave us over 1400 years ago still applies today. Allah knows best.

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Deleted User

Mar 8, 2020 08:18

Wazyslam I met some ladies from Nigeria ,some of them from the same state with me ,but they turn me down with out any good reason, what I understood from them is that they are here for materialistic. And later they will be the ones shouting about scammers .when they invite the scammers themselves.

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Deleted User

Mar 8, 2020 09:45

Best no to complain. Ladies read your complaints...no one likes a conplainer.

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Deleted User

Mar 9, 2020 10:12

Abdullahi Yahaya
Don't mind them, just be yourself and don't pretend. The right woman will walk into your life. Most woman nowadays don't really know what they really want. They left the real one for the fake ones. Such is life, they want already made man that can pay all their bills. Mind you, all are not the same. Keep praying brother, the right one will walk into yout life with time. What will be will be
Ma salam

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Deleted User

Mar 10, 2020 00:22

I think Amir is slipping away......................

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Deleted User

Mar 24, 2020 11:13

There are no specific date sets for Nikah. What is recommended is that when you find a good Man (a Muslim) for your daughter (or yourself in this case) do not procrastinate. for delaying will only bring fitnah (problem).

In this case of meeting a man online, i will advice get to know him & his family (while maintaining Islamic rules), then introduce him to your parent. If your minds are made up & your parents permits to go ahead,
Please do not postpone, do not wait for big weeding, big gift or wait to finish school or job. Do your Nikah in a simple & blessed way. remember the most blessed of Nikah is the simple and least expensive.
Nikah does not stop Schooling or other forms of learning. Discuss with your husband to-be and agree on completing your studies. you can seek a transfer of job or even quit the Job for Allah sake, the best will await you in the new place (experience have shown).

Bottom line, the prophet frowns at postponing good deed for any reason other than the pleasure of Allah. Postponement will only bring FITNAH.

May Allah guide us aright.

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Deleted User

Mar 27, 2020 00:37

I think if you meet the person that you feel is right for you, i.e after making istikhara of course, then you shouldn't delay the nikkah, coz if you do, you are giving shaidan an opportunity to ruin the relationship before it's even started. You shouldn't have to leave school because of marriage because any reasonable man would know that an educated woman is an asset to have. So, talk to him and agree on a plan of how you would complete your studies after marriage. As for work, you can always find another one, so that shouldn't be a reason for you to refuse a proposal. If you are lucky to find a man who is able to support you without you having to work, then that's perfect. You can always start something small from home while you give your kids the best upbringing that they deserve. This is just my opinion though. Feel free to disagree.

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Deleted User

Apr 21, 2020 17:49



Sheikh Muḥammad ibn 'Abdillāh Bā Jammāl wrote:

The dangers of Bid'ah are severe and numerous; from them is:

𝟙. That whoever introduces something new (into the Religion) or practices an innovation that was introduced by someone else, then this is futile and it will be rejected.

𝟚. Bid'ah is misguidance, and misguidance leads to the Hellfire.

𝟛. They (the people of innovation) are prevented from repentance (Tawbah), and they are not granted success in that (i.e. Repenting) until they leave off their innovation.

𝟜. Those who advocate Bid'ah are essentially accusing the Prophet ﷺ in regards to his knowledge, integrity and piety.

𝟝. The people of innovation are prevented from drinking from the Prophet ﷺ's pond (Ḥawḍh).

𝟞. Bid'ah causes a person to become biased towards his innovation, even if it meant distorting the Quranic verses and prophetic traditions from their true meanings just to aid his innovation.

𝟟. The people of innovation contradict and oppose the Prophet ﷺ.

𝟠. The people of innovation follow a path other than that of the (true) believers.

𝟡. The people of innovation indirectly accuse the Prophet ﷺ of treachery; in that he has not directed his ummah to every good.

𝟙𝟘. Innovating into the Religion implies that the Religion is incomplete.

𝟙𝟙. Bid'ah is a reason for assigning one's logic in determining right from wrong and rejecting the divine texts.

𝟙𝟚. One Bid'ah leads a person onto another.

𝟙𝟛. Bid'ah causes a person to abandon the Sunnah.

𝟙𝟜. Bid'ah is more beloved to Iblīs than sins; because one does not repent from Bid'ah whilst they repent from sins.

𝟙𝟝. Bid'ah leads a person to fabricate Ḥadīth in support of his Bid'ah.

𝟙𝟞. Bid'ah causes division amongst the Muslims, it dismantles their unity and weakens their strength.

📚Source: [At-Tuḥfatul 'Aliyyah 'Alal Mandhūmatil Lāmiyyah pg. 166 - 167]

✍🏽Translated by:
Abū Ishāq Muḥammad Ibn Aḥmad Bā 'Alawi


Sep 24, 2021 12:53

@Deleted user; I disagree men to quit complaining because of a fear to lose a potential partner
The truth need to be told; irregardless of who it displeases and sometimes its good to share the burden of your heart with others; so that your heart can be lighter
The only problem with complaining is that it does not correct the problem, I mean, they won't stop turning down your proposal "baselessly" simply because you have commented
Thats the wisdom behind encouraging and discouraging. If it for correction, well, its Allah who guides people, not our wordings. If its for lighting your heart, sharing information, its good you do it. Sb maybe in your situation and would be appreciative to know that this community is larger and they too belong somewhere
So, before we criticise sb, lets try to read their intentions
Allahu aalam


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