Helahel

Picky and ignorant women.

Picky and ignorant women.

Bhulji86 Created Nov 29, 2017 18:57
13 Comments

Hello and I want to say that the women here are picky. They look for handsome men. They also ignore people of the East. I have many a times sent women of the west messages and just a few replied. They think all eastern men are green card lookers, while they are not. Please women understand that it is not the face that counts it is the moral that counts. What good it is if you are beautiful and immoral? So if the moral is bad then the beauty is useless. Also we all are beautiful as god has created us so we should not say this or that one is ugly. So please reply ladies and not you not reply.

 

This topic has 18 comments

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Deleted User

Dec 3, 2017 09:08

If someone is not interested in you, why would she needs to reply to you, just to tell you that she is not interested? Silence is also an answer.

Bhulji86

Dec 3, 2017 10:35

Well silence is rudeness you can also say you are not interested by saying thanks for sending a message but I am not interested. What is the meaning of communicating? It is to send and receive. Failing to reply is to show that you are ignoring and uneducated as educated people understand the meaning of communication. No matter what it is when you have a message you are supposed to reply. Also here we are not talking about interest rather we are talking about being picky.

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Deleted User

Dec 3, 2017 10:39

Silence is answer when you already know each other.
But not responding to someone's message is kinda rude...

Plz don't get offended by this opinion... you can simply say i am not interested and the other person should also understand your response.

Cheers.

Bhulji86

Dec 3, 2017 10:48

Salaam aleykum dear brother of Pakistan. Thanks for sharing my mind and for accepting my opinion. May Allah bless you with a good woman. Ameen.

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Deleted User

Dec 3, 2017 11:02

Ok, I thought about what you said and I must say you are right. Muslim sisters should be genuine to everybody. I should probably work on my behavior with strangers. I invite all other sisters to follow me in this step by simply answering on NOT INTERESTING MESSAGES with one short and genuine: "I am very sorry, but I don't find myself interested in you. May Allah finds you a woman you will be pleased with."...or something like that.

I would also like to give my public apology to everybody who didn't receive* any answer from me and those are many, cause I answered only...well maybe to 3 - 4 people here.

*Note to one specific man who reads this: I wanted to write *didn't received* but then I remembered your small grammar lesson from the other day. ☺

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Deleted User

Dec 3, 2017 11:31

..and about being picky...this is probably true but speaking about myself...I don't need absolutely anything from a man who contacts me for the first time. I just need A CLICK! One simply click in my head that will push me to involve deeper with him. I may have 1000 preferences in my head about how my future husband should be, but one simple click can beat them all.

For example: I don't usually answer to people who don't have a profile picture. This specific man didn't have any picture on the beginning, his bio was too short which is also a minus for me, he is younger than me, imagine 7 years younger and I was always attracted by men much older than me..his first message was short and I prefer longer messages cause you need to introduce yourself in a decent way to someone.

But...I had a CLICK with him. There was one word, just one word in his message that took my attention. And imagine: that word was actually a spelling mistake!

And now we're exchanging messages longer than this page.

That click is not just a click, it can be simply called a DESTINY.

May Allah chooses what's best for you cause we really don't know what's best for us.

Bhulji86

Dec 3, 2017 12:17

Azra it is nice that you got the meaning of my say and it is also nice that you will do that. Regarding getting a spouse or partner yes let us or we have to leave it in the hands of Allah but forget not that the very same lord says try and leave it up to me in giving you what you want. So we should try to find a spouse while it is in the hands of the lord and not we do no thing and say Allah will do it.

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Deleted User

Dec 3, 2017 16:12

You are right, I just say that we should follow our inner voice in choosing a partner, and we shouldn't always look into the preferences made from our brain. If some sister reads this, this is also my genuine advice to her.

If you have some "click" with a man and you like his emaan, don't think too much about distance, fortune, his hight or I don't know what...

You mentioned a good looks or something like that. I visited your profile and I must say that you are a good looking brother. So don't lose your confidence just because you didn't got many replies here. You probably wrote to a wrong women. Wrong for you but maybe the right for someone else.

Maybe change your approach and see what will happen. Women like to feel special, believe me I can tell the difference between a message sent to me as an individual, and a group message sent to many.

Be patient, inshaAllah the right thing will come to you when you even don't expect it.

Good luck to everybody!

Bhulji86

Dec 3, 2017 17:02

Azra thanks for those words and you have made me feel happy. You too are good looking and I pray that you get a good man. I feel my way of getting to a woman's heart is a good way. I look not at age, colour, wealth and other things, I think this is the right way of looking for a woman as if we will look at race or age then we will lag behind and not get good people also to look at the mentioned things is unislamic as god says do not ignore people. Now if I do not get a woman despite of this approach then certainly god has something for me otherwise why would any woman say no to me.

Lifepartner

Dec 4, 2017 00:26

This site seems to have a lot of room for improvement, I would like to see the addition of marital status, like never married / married, divorced, widowed, no of children, living together or not, etc and preferences. This will improve response rate as we are approaching someone knowing their preferences.

Bhulji86

Dec 4, 2017 04:41

Yes brother.

Motorcom

Dec 5, 2017 04:04

The reality is that there are not many genuine female potentials here. If there are any, they will list so many prerequisites that only a Prince is suitable for them. The rest of them are sweet talkers who are scammers out to get your money!

Bhulji86

Dec 5, 2017 15:19

True it is what you are saying motorcom. It is what I said before and in my first comment here, that women in this website look at looks and are choosy hence the headline picky and ignorant women. I wish they stop to do that.

Mohamed

Dec 26, 2017 14:05

Asalamu'alaikum brothers, humanity is about being able to accommodate diversity and knowing how to deal with it. There are all kinds of people in this world and they are all different in terms of upbringing, culture, education, tribe, creed, religion, approach and thinking. Everyone is going to project a different opinion and people don't follow a common set of life rules. Replying or not replying form part of the actions that determine what kind of a person you're communicating with. I've had all sorts of characters to deal with on this site: Scammers, highly judgemental people, a few nice individuals who were honest and courteous. One lady really appreciated me and we started to talk, then all of a sudden she realised my age and dropped me like a hot potato (LOL). It's amazing how age, skin colour, social status and nationality have become the deciding factors for a relationship. Any woman or man who upholds islamic values and is blessed with a nice character will have a totally different approach.

FeminineHeart

Dec 26, 2017 17:53

The real question here is would you send a message to someone you are not attracted to?

When someone sends me a message to express their interest, I really appreciate it, and I'm not just saying it, I mean it. I sincerely appreciate it. In the past, I used to reply to messages sent by people I'm not interested in, I would even explain to them why I'm not interested, so we would move on, but whenever I do that, it gives them a false hope and they would send me another message to try to convince me otherwise, which makes the situation harder and even more awkward. I don't mean to hurt anyone, that's why I decided to do not reply if I know for sure that I'm not interested. It's out of respect, not arrogance.

It's important for everybody to understand that this is an online method. It lacks of so many human aspects and emotions. People would make decisions about you based on your profile. They would look at your picture, see your information, and read your self-description, and that's how they would decide if they are interested or not. It's the reality of the situation.

Rejection is just part of the process. We ALL had our share of rejection. This doesn't mean that there is something wrong with you when someone shows no interest, it only means that you are not what they are looking for. You are someone else's match and there is for sure people who are looking for someone who's exactly like you. If you feel that you cannot handle rejection, just delete your profile and quit the online idea all together.

Many people here are sincere in their search for a spouse. Keep on trying and don't lose hope in the mercy of Allah. You will meet your future spouse in the time and place that Allah decreed for you inshaAllah.

So again, would you send a message to someone you are not attracted to or interested in?
If your answer is "no", then don't expect someone who is not interested in you to send you a message back.

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Orangeblossom

Dec 26, 2017 23:27

Salam alaykum I am quite astounded by some of the misogynistic comments and almost racist connotations. I have only been on this site for a few weeks and some of the offers I have received, I would never encounter in real life. So block straight away stops offensive comments and requests.decent brothers cannot understand why sisters seem so aggressive it's actually defensive because there are brothers who are perhaps not so good or aware of their deen. This mode of communication is still in its infancy and only uses 10 per cent of our ability to communicate misunderstandings happen. We should try and be patient and respectful of each other. We are all part of one ummah.

Bhulji86

Dec 30, 2017 22:28

Sisters blocking or not answering is not right. If you want not to talk then just say so or give some reason instead of being quiet and hence rude. Islam says be kind to others and thus it means be polite to others. Where is Islam when someone says hello and you respond not or when someone with a good intention sends you a message here for marriage and you keep quiet? So that means Islam is not being followed we just speak of Islam but we do not do what it says. Also talking or communication is a two way thing thus send and receive, so when you receive and not reply or send you make communication be not complete and you seem to be or are rude and you ignore the other person in the other end. How do you sisters feel when your emails are not replied to tell honestly? And if you sisters will say you feel bad not then you sisters are angels and not humans. Also education wise, we are taught in school to be good to others and thus to greet others and to reply to others when we are greeted, the same goes for messages. So school teaches us to be morally good and not just maths and English, thus educated means to be morally good and to be able to read and write, now is one educated when one knows how to read and write and responds not to messages?

Bhulji86

Dec 30, 2017 22:52

True Mohammed.

 

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